Saturday, May 2, 2009

Hey, I'm Still here....

Hey all. Man, has it been a while since I posted anything. Life has been .... busy. There has been so much going on since I posted in January. I don't even know where to start. Bleah.


I really want to start with tonight, I guess. A strange thing happened. Today was my day off. I had nothing planned except that I would clean my bathroom and do some laundry. Hmm.... The bathroom didn't get cleaned. I just couldn't get motivated. Then, around 11:00 PM, after watching a movie, I decided that although I could get by a couple more days without doing laundry, I was motivated to at least do that now. Okay. I got my dirty clothes together and grabbed the laundry soap and some quarters and to the laundry room I went. 

The laundry room is right next to my apartment. It couldn't be closer without being in my apartment. The door to the laundry room was mostly shut. Unusual. Sometimes, when people do laundry early in the morning, they shut the door to muffle the sound so it won't bother anyone, but there was no washer or dryer running. Hmmm.... so I pushed the door open and turned the light on....

And there was someone sleeping under the clothes folding table. It's more of a bench, really. He was all tucked in with his head on his pack and his skateboard under his arm. And he looked like he was between 25 and 30. And he was very apologetic. He said he was sorry, but it was just so cold outside. Yeah, it's May, but we had a nasty storm come through today - raining and hail all day. It is chilly out. And it's the strangest thing. He said he would leave if I wanted him to. I thought about it for a second and told him no, I'd wait and do my laundry tomorrow. He said that I could go ahead and do it now, it wouldn't bother him. I said no, that's okay, and closed the door and went back to my apartment. 

And then the logic kicked in and I asked myself what the hell I was doing. I should call the cops. There is a strange man sleeping in my laundry room not 15 feet from my door. But I am not afraid of him (mostly) and I don't know if that is good or bad. I don't feel inclined to do anything else for him. Just not turn him out (or in).

Hmm... and I think most of the people I know would think me foolish. I'm not so sure I'm not. But in the moment, there was no 'scary vibe' coming from him. I have experienced that and I can't explain. I just know that I could not chase him out tonight. As I closed the door on him, he said thank you, you're beautiful. Hmm.... He did not have the appearance of someone on drugs and he was not drunk. I don't know what his story is. But for some reason, I could not tell him to leave. It was not fear of him. It was compassion for him - I think. I don't know.

I know there are friends who will read this and wonder what the hell I'm doing. I don't know. I am sitting here typing this and he is sleeping on the floor in the laundry room not more than 25 feet from me. And my door is locked and I will probably sleep in my clothes tonight... and I'm not sure what to think. I have no desire for him to be thrown out and yet my mind wonders if I have the right to make that decision for the other 30 some tenants in this building. I don't know. The thought crossed my mind to call the cops, but I can't seem to justify that. I've been too close to being in that position myself, maybe, to want to do that to someone else...

So.... I will go to bed here in a little bit. And do my laundry in the morning.... I have asked Papa if he is safe or if I need to call the cops. No answer except that there is no fear or uneasiness....

Hmm... strange.....